Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
