she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
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