Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
