don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
