also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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