Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
