he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
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