haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
