Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Randomize
