Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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