I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
