Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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