You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
