Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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