It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
