Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
