he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
