Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
