how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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