you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
