Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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