So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
