I cockslap morals
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just gargled with NyQuil
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
