let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
send nudes
from the living room?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
