And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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