party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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