So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
