I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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