before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
