Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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