one might say we're banned from that church
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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