if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Randomize
