This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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