Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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