i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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