party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
