i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
