It's like God shit irony all over that family
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
