i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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