Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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