What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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