I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize