I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
