Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i wish my penis had a tongue
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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