No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
