Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
