No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
being pregnant is like rehab
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
