I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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