Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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