nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
